Sunday/Monday Night

Really really annoyed tonight. Can't really say why. But most definitely I can say, I really, really, hate; people.
They are so bothersome and make no sense. They do stupid things. Say stupid things. And then they just sit grumpily about. I mean why bother. I know I can't deal with people very well, let alone communicate, but when I have to hobble and explain time and time again, I am scared of them, please understand/ do something human, I get so very annoyed when the response is cold.
I guess I still expect to much,

Monday Night;
I am calmer and less tired tonight. I decided to stay in and make everyone happy. It has turned to be of a slight benefit so far. I have planned what I will do within the next 24 hours and I have eaten some "nice" food. Though indigestion tablets are now required. (ILL PERSON FACE!)
I have organised that tomorrow I will begin a hobby endeavour of programming for games. Reasoning being that if I understand how to code and assemble games, this will help my understanding of sound in games and by extension, I should be able to be part of a team focusing on my part without faffing about other things. Or I create my own works! Yay.
So as epiphanies come and go, one epiphany I have recently is that whilst I am of the belief that if I focus on too large a thing, I will never accomplish the end goal. Small victories amount of fast.
But as depression is taking over my life like forest fire with the additional sphere of man felling smoke, I had to think, what is one thing, that I can singularly made me feel happy two years ago, but is not there now.
To expand this criteria to a point where I can say that moment made happy was difficult.
As mentioned before, to remember the good stuff, is incredibly difficult. So, I had to think hard about a time where cloudiness couldn't possible exist. And the thought that instantly popped out was an answer I keep giving to the question "When are you at your peak of happiness?" (A stupid question that serves it purpose).
The answer is; "when I am playing games/am around people". However, as previous nights suggest, with the definition that people are any given human being I come in to contact with, people do not make me happy, in fact they result in anger and sadness. The answer is when I was around my close friends. People who cared for one another in more than a passive aggressive style do nothing but complain or laugh at things no one else could ever care for.
The people I liked being around, I liked them because they enabled behaviours in me that normally are not acceptable but, did so to a degree that kept me in line. We had fun to do nothing, instead of doing nothing to hope for fun.
So my first small battle to win. I need to find these people. And find where they are now. Assemble them, and then enable their new behaviours. Maybe they will reciprocate. or maybe we all have got worse over time. But my victory this summer. Will be assembling my team of "avengers". Shouldn't be the greatest challenge ever. But at least it will result in me being tired beyond reason and by extension, I will either have great friends to make an effort for.
Or I will confirm the worst nightmare.
But!
If I am to end on a satisfying note. I need to just say something. Which should leave anyone puzzled.

So Epiphanies? Why do people get them so much when they are on the toilet?
Far too often I have seen this happen to not be a coincidence!